It was first, a love. Kindled by the purity of childhood. The willingness of young hearts to abandon the fear of inadequacy. The ability to think within moments rather than years.

So it was first free and full of unbridled possibility.

Before, with the addition of time and the removal of sweet oblivion, it became a passion. A drive towards success, towards proving an indeterminable element.

Before it became a sadness. A fear. And a seemingly impossible path back to love. The beginning. The essence embodied by equs. By girl.

It was a brave thing I did. Walking away. Abandoning one extreme for another – this one cloistered in bright lights and siren screams. The City.

I took New York on. Banked everything on its potential to change me. To pull me from the rigid case I’d built. The scaly skin of perfection.

Non linearly, it did this. . Built up old walls only to break them down. Peeled away layers with invisible precision – the kind only mobilized in retrospect. Only understood in reflection.

From this place I’ve rediscovered. This horse. This unencumbered joy.